[insert arm shooting straight up into the air]
The Universal Representative: Yes, Ima.
Ima: Ummm...can I go now?
TUR: Well, I don't know. Let's see....(she checks her clipboard). Are you over Stephen?
Ima: Nope.
TUR: Duuude. It's been like three mo--
Ima: I know. I know. I am a big fat fool. Woohoo. I get it. Anyway, is that a prerequisite to being granted departure rights?
TUR: No, not really. In fact, a change of scenery would be good for you.
Ima: So? Can I go?
TUR: (checks clipboard again). Well, do you have a job?
Ima: No.
TUR: (scribbles on the clipboard).
Ima: Look, I thought getting healthy was my job.
TUR: Fair enough. But did you? Did you get healthy?
Ima: Well, I talked with the nurse just fifteen minutes ago and she said that my final lab results show that I am absolutely and completely NORMAL - uterinely speaking, of course.
TUR: So, you have a clean bill of health then?
Ima: (Beaming.) Yes, yes I do.
TUR: Happy to hear it. And now, about your mental health...
Ima: That's an ongoing project, I am afraid.
TUR: Well, nothing to be afraid of. I have faith in you. But really, you have got to let go of Cap'n Britain once and for all.
Ima: I know. I know. It's just that, well, I wanted to marry him - and that's deep!! That takes time, sister! I am talking really deep - like middle of the ocean deep. Like the opposite of ---
TUR: Okay, I get it. It's deep and you need more time. (She writes Ghod know's what - no, Ghod really does know what.)
Ima: So? Can I blow this cow town?
TUR: Oh, yeah, definitely! (Smile - Salute.) Bon Voyage!
Ima: Rock on, Rep. of the Uni.!!
TUR: (wink) Take it easy...and if it's nice take it twice! Ha ha.
Ima: Okay, yeah, that's enough now.
TUR: Yeah, you're right. Talk to you later then.
Ima: Okay, talk to you later... tonight, probably.
TUR: Yeah, alright. See you tonight then.
Ima: Okay. Later.
TUR: Later
[insert vision of Ima skipping away]
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3 comments:
KBob: Congratulations on your clean bill of (uterine) health!
Mich: Thank you, you are so kind!
KBob: So now what...?
Mich: Beats me. I have to ask my psychic.
Kbob: Make up your own damn mind, fercrynoutloud.
Mich: It's none of your business anyway.
Kbob: I know. Stay away from TESOL and men for 30 days. If you feel better after that, go for 60.
Mich: It's still none of your business.
Kbob: It's only because I care.
Mich: Beat it! Wait, come back...
Oh KBob, you're tres cute!!!
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